Are you an engineer who is a whiz at solving complex design challenges? Or maybe you’re the company’s go-to-pro for IT issues? When it comes to making relationship-building conversation, however, you’re stuck! And you need to build have these conversations to push your business or career forward!
Below are a few tips to help ease you through conversations while networking:
- Start with small talk; find your comfort zone within N.O.R.M. ( News, Occupation, Recreation, Money) – topics that are easy to discuss: a news story, sports event, popular movie, or hobby, for example. If your companion is a mechanical engineer or computer systems manager and you are knowledgeable in the area, feel free to talk shop. Otherwise, any noncontroversial, general-knowledge topic will do. The goal is to find common ground and put both of you at ease. Then you can move on to more substantive topics,
- Hold off formulating a response, while the other person is speaking. Just listen. This is not only the courteous thing to do; it’s strategic. While developing a reply while the other person is speaking, you may miss response clues they are offering. You may also wind up turning rose-red:
Let’s say the other person mentions a trip to Nashville. Your start formulating a response and, as such, tune out for a minute. She stops, giving you a chance to take the stage. No reason to sweat – you have a response. You ask her if she’ll be able to squeeze in a trip to the Grand Ole Opry. She looks at you quizzically – with good reason. In the minute your attention strayed, she added that the company decided to send her to Beijing instead. If you had stayed with the conversation you would have referenced the Great Wall instead of a country-music icon. Your face would have maintained its color, and she would have felt heard.
- Give yourself a break by asking questions. Let the other person assume some of the heavy conversation lifting. This is particularly helpful, if the person is excited, invested in the topic. They’ll be able to talk at length—and appreciate you for the opportunity! Showing curiosity and, thus, interest, by asking questions can go a long way toward easing the conversation strain for you. Just be sure you contribute to the conversation as well.
Conversations do not have to be endurance tests for high-tech professionals. Come to a networking event with a few small-talk topics in your quiver, listen for clues that will help you create a response and show curiosity. You’ll position yourself to make productive connections and, just maybe, have a good time in the process.
